If You Died Tomorrow, What Will People Write About You?
The Best Way To Honor A Loved One Recently Passed Away
Each person’s life is a work of art. When a person passes away, only the body dies. The memory of their life can be remembered and their life honored through a a poem or memoir.
An Uncle of mine recently passed away, and I felt compelled to write a short memorial piece on him. It was for him, and for the family. In fact, I spent some time in the evening, wrote a poem in memory of his life and sent it to our closest family.
There is something strangely touching when writing to recap a person’s life. It is a license to feel and to live emotions and feel love and feel pain. But most importantly to acknowledge the life that they led.
In times of death and life moving on to its next form, one can’t help but wonder what are we doing with our own lives. If we were to pass on from life in this form, in our current physical body, what would people write about you?
I wrote about my uncle and his uncanny ability to be observant and his trustworthiness. I wrote about his ability to support us in the weakest and strongest of moments alike. As a child, he LISTENED to me. He would give me an approving nod and confirmation of things that I saw and believed in. These simple actions meant so much to me then and means so much to me now. Simply enjoying time making a puzzle together with someone, shows that you think they are important.
My Uncle and I made a huge jigsaw puzzle together. From memory it was 7,500 pieces of the United States. This was back in the day before people spent all their time on their phones, people mostly talked to each other or did other activities together. I learned something about persistence from that time period. No matter how good you were at jigsaw puzzles, you could not finish it so quickly. You had to work hard and keep working at it consistently if you wanted the big win in the end.
I recently tried doing a 1,000 piece with my 4 year old daughter and realized I probably did a 750 or maybe 1,500 piece puzzle over 1–2 weeks back in the day. It just FELT like much more. My daughter does do 48-72 piece puzzles by herself, and together we’ve done a 250 piece puzzle, and a (I think) 500 piece puzzle. I quit the 1,000 piece for when she’s older.
No one will remember you for the amount of money you had in your bank. But they may remember generous donations to salvage animals which bring jobs, well being and good will.
No one will remember you for ignoring your responsibilities and binge-watching TVs shows for days on end. But they may remember how you helped them through a tough time, or helped them land a well-paying job.
No one will remember you for missing out on family gatherings, community outings, volunteer events, kids sporting events, etc. But they may remember you for being that ONE person that believed in them.
I have not experienced many deaths of those close to me. As I get older, I know this will become more and more common. But here is something I know now. EVERY PERSON ALIVE HAS THINGS THEY DID WELL. There are things every person can be proud of. There are small things that you have done and can do to change the course of another person’s life, even if so slightly.
Acknowledge the people in your life today that support you. Let them know how the little things they do help you. And, in the eventual act of passing away, let people know what amazing things they have done. Honor life with an acknowledgement of the person’s best acts in life.
Instead of the “How are you?” that we ask so often, start your next conversation with telling your friend or family member the things you most admire about them. The things you would say about them if they did pass away.
